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20+ Funniest Quotes from Kim’s Convenience

Now into its fifth season, the CBC comedy based on Ins Choi’s award-winning play has resonated with viewers for its heartfelt representation of Asian-Canadian stories. Here are 20+ of the funniest moments from Kim’s Convenience that’ll make you laugh all over again.

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Appa and Umma in the storePhoto: CBC

Appa on gossiping:

“Stop! Every time you gossip, you make the baby Jesus cry.” – Appa, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “Thinkin’ ‘Bout Inkin’”

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Umma in the storePhoto: CBC

Umma on hard choices:

“I want our family together but I also want a working dishwasher.” – Umma, Kim’s Convenience, Season 3, “New Appa-liance”

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Mr. Mehta in the storePhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Mr. Mehta on the weather:

“The weather! My God! It’s…everywhere.” – Mr. Mehta, Kim’s Convenience, Season 3, “Cutie Pie”

If you enjoyed these Kim’s Convenience quotes, you’ll want to check out the best comedy movies on Netflix Canada right now.

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Mr. ChinPhoto: CBC

Mr. Chin on martial arts superstars:

“Holy s***, Mr. Kim, you is Bruce Lee and Jet Li all rolled into one plump Korean!” – Mr. Chin, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Hapkido”

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Jung at Handy RentalsPhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Jung on budgeting:

“Why pay for stuff when other people can, right?” – Jung, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “New TV”

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Appa in the storePhoto: CBC

Appa on a balanced diet:

“Come. We eat from our sad food group starting with cookie dough ice cream.” – Appa, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “Janet’s Boyfriend”

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Gerald and Chelsea in the apartmentPhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Gerald on hospitality:

“I even topped up the waterbed so it’s ready for your snooze cruise. Your only ports of call will be Dreamville and Slumber City.” – Gerald, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “Cardboard Jung”

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Kims Convenience Quotes - ShannonPhoto: CBC

Shannon on yogurt-stealing etiquette:

“But seriously, if you’re going to steal someone’s yogurt, eat the whole thing. Don’t just tunnel down to the fruit then leave it.” – Shannon, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Rude Kid”

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Kimchee in the storePhoto: CBC

Kimchee on drinkable cheese:

“You’ve obviously never tried Velveeta. That’s a sippin’ cheese.” – Kimchee, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “Appa’s First Text”

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Appa in the storePhoto: CBC

Appa on the art of the sneak attack:

“Mrs. Kim is very smart sneak attack. Almost best. Almost…” – Appa, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Service”

Don’t miss our roundup of poignant Downton Abbey quotes.

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Mr. Mehta in the storePhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Mr. Mehta on going to the movies:

“Raj is taking me to a full-price movie. He won’t even let me sneak in our snacks. We will be purchasing them. Again, full price. The mind boggles.” – Mr. Mehta, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “Janet’s Boyfriend”

You’ll laugh out loud at these silly restaurant reviews from your favourite TV characters.

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Appa reclining on a chairPhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Appa on questionable snacks:

“I put in my mouth apple cut with the blood and the garbage of murder knife?” – Appa, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “Knife Strife”

When you need the laughs to come fast, here are 75 short jokes anyone can remember.

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Umma in the storePhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Umma on after-Appa plans:

“After mourning period, I move into fancy condo and upgrade to Sleep Number Bed.” – Umma, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “Bon Voyage”

Do you remember these famous TV cliffhangers?

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Shannon singing karaoke in the Handy officePhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Shannon on singing like nobody’s watching:

“I’m closing up the store and I’m crushin’ it. Finished up the payroll and I’m crushin’ it. Probably should go home, I’m not rushin’ it. And I’m gonna get some wine, I’m lushin’ it.” – Shannon, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Handyman”

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Kims Convenience Quotes - AppaPhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Appa on making the right impression:

“In my funeral photo, I want to be looking successful.” – Appa, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Ddong Chim”

These great Mad Men quotes will really make you think.

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Gerald and Janet at OCADPhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Gerald on childhood memories:

“The coolest thing my dad ever let me do was smoke one of his cigarettes. I was five, so it’s less cool and more negligent.” – Gerald, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “Beacon of Truth”

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Umma and JanetPhoto: CBC

Umma on facial hair:

“You don’t like his beard? This is a miracle. Most Korean men, they cannot grow beard. But this land is fertile.” – Umma, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Wingman”

Don’t miss these Breaking Bad quotes on life, death, and everything in between.

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Janet in the storePhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Janet on double standards:

“’Cool Christian Korean boy.’ That’s all I’ve heard my entire life. And she was engaged to a white guy.” – Janet, Kim’s Convenience, Season 1, “Handyman”

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Kims Convenience Quotes - ChelseaPhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Chelsea on breakups:

“I’m not friends with any exes. When a relationship is done, that person is dead to me. I burn everything they gave me and erase them from my life.” – Chelsea, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “Thinkin’ ‘Bout Inkin’”

Watch out for these signs your relationship is about to end.

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Terence and his puzzle in the Handy officePhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Terence on the sanctity of puzzles:

“It’s just funny, how we don’t eat each other’s lunches but we think we can do each other’s puzzles.” – Terence, Kim’s Convenience, Season 4, “In the Bedroom”

Here’s why jigsaw puzzles are good for your brain.

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Kims Convenience Quotes - Jung in Shannon's officePhoto: facebook.com/kimsconvenience

Jung on turning a negative to a positive:

“Your hate just makes me more beautiful.” – Jung, Kim’s Convenience, Season 2, “Cardboard Jung”

Next, relieve the saga of the Rose family with this round-up of funny Schitt’s Creek quotes.