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Funny Physics Jokes Every Science Lover Will Appreciate

We're not just fission for laughs here.

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Beef Burger with the lot at a fish and chip shopPhoto: Lisa Holmen Photography/Shutterstock

It’s all beef to me

Q: Why does a burger have less energy than a steak?
A: Because it’s in its ground state.

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A classic clock in black & white tone with blur backgroundPhoto: Ohmphoto/Shutterstock

Relatively slow

Einstein developed a theory about space. And, boy, it was about time, too!

These hilarious DIY jokes will bring down the house!

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Photo: fizkes/Shutterstock

Have physics, will travel

A photon checks into a hotel, where a bellhop asks where its suitcase is.
The photon replies, “I didn’t bring any luggage. I’m travelling light.”

These funny Monday jokes will help you make it through the week.

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Electric hand lamps with ceiling LED lamp, spotlight. The concept of repair and maintenance.Photo: svershinsky/Shutterstock

A tough problem to solve

Q: How many general-relativity theoretists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two. One to hold the bulb and one to rotate space.

Check out this side-splitting collection of the funniest one-liners on the Internet.

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Molecular, DNA and atom model in science research labPhoto: alice-photo/Shutterstock

Lies, all lies

Q: Why can’t you trust an atom?
A: They make up everything.

Impress a history buff with these hilarious history jokes.

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Lighting DecorationPhoto: Bangkokhappiness/Shutterstock

No light bulbs allowed

Q: Why can’t you take electricity to social outings?
A: Because it doesn’t know how to conduct itself.

These silly light bulb jokes are sure to put a smile on your face.

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Hand of chemist with pencil writing down observations in laboratoryPhoto: Pressmaster/Shutterstock

Logic problem

You enter the high school lab and see an experiment. How will you know which class is it?

If it’s green and wiggles, it’s biology.
If it stinks, it’s chemistry.
If it doesn’t work, it’s physics.

These hilarious golf jokes are better than a hole in one.

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glass of scotch whiskey with ice cubes on a rustic wooden table, copy space in the brown backgroundPhoto: Maren Winter/Shutterstock

Free drink

A neutron walks into a bar and asks, “How much for a whiskey?”
The bartender smiles and says, “For you, no charge.”

Check out these witty bar jokes for any occasion.

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portrait of chicken in crowded barnPhoto: Anton Havelaar/Shutterstock

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Aristotle: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.
Issac Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest, chickens in motion tend to cross roads.
Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends on your frame of reference.
Werner Heisenberg: We are not sure which side of the road the chicken was on, but it was moving very fast.
Wolfgang Pauli: There already was a chicken on this side of the road.

Don’t miss these bad jokes you can’t help but laugh at.

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Car racing spinning wheel burns rubber on floor.Photo: Zynatis/Shutterstock

Tough start

I have a new theory on inertia, but it doesn’t seem to be gaining momentum.

Check out these up-and-coming Canadian comedians—and their best jokes!

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Close up of male hand holding horseshoe magnetPhoto: tkyszk/Shutterstock

Back-handed compliment

Q: What did the male magnet say to the female magnet?
A: Seeing you from the back, I thought you were repulsive. But seeing you from the front, I find you rather attractive.

It doesn’t have to be Pi Day (March 14) to bring out these funny math jokes!

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Friends do a fist bump close up isolated on whitePhoto: De Repente/Shutterstock

Throwing punches

Q: What did the quantum physicist say before the bar fight?
A: Let me atom!

You won’t believe these funny classified ads actually ran!

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Mallard duck male in active flight.Photo: Gallinago_media/Shutterstock

Physics for the birds

Q: What did the duck say to the physicist?
A: Quark, quark, quark!

These funny work cartoons were made for sharing at the office.

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Homemade banana split with on the rustic background. Selective focus.Photo: Andrew Pustiakin/Shutterstock

Saying goodbye

Q: What did one uranium-238 nucleus say to the other?
A: Gotta split!

It doesn’t have to be National Tell a Joke Day to enjoy these corny jokes!

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Ginger red tabby cat walking along a corrugated tin roofPhoto: Chris Mirek Freeman/Shutterstock

Experiment on a hot tin roof

Q: Two cats of the same size slide down a roof at the same time, but one falls off first. Which one?
A: The one with the smaller “mew.”

Have trouble making it to the punchline? These hilarious short jokes are easy to remember!

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Legs bankrupt in black holey socks on a black backgroundPhoto: Ruslan Galiullin/Shutterstock

A beginner’s guide to physics

Relativity: When the family gets together
Black holes: What you get in black socks
Critical mass: A big group of film reviewers
Hyperspace: Where you park at the superstore

If you enjoyed these physics jokes, you’ll definitely want to check out the funniest Reader’s Digest jokes of all time.

Originally Published on Reader's Digest