13 Funny Dad Quotes to Use This Father’s Day
Can’t find the right words for dad this Father’s Day? Take inspiration from these funny quotes by the likes of Jon Stewart, Jimmy Fallon, Mark Twain, and more.
“You can tell what was the best year of your father’s life, because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.”
“When you’re young, you think your dad is Superman. Then you grow up, and you realize he’s just a drunk guy who wears a cape.”
“I gave my father $100 and said, “Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.” So he went out and bought a present for my mother.”
Check out these 10 Honest Marriage Quotes from Famous Men.
“My daughter got me a “World’s Best Dad” mug. So we know she’s sarcastic.”
“Even though I’m proud by dad invented the rear-view mirror, we’re not as close as we appear.”
“We wondered why when a child laughed, he belonged to Daddy, and when he had a sagging diaper that smelled like a landfill, ‘He wants his mother.’”
“The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, the second half by our children.”
Here are tips on how to care for aging parents, even from a distance.
Four-year-old: Tell me a scary story!
Me: One time little people popped out of your mom, and they never stopped asking questions.
“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant, I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”
“Sometimes I am amazed that my wife and I created two human beings from scratch yet struggle to assemble the most basic of IKEA cabinets.”