Love, Laughter & Good Karma
RD Face to Face with the Dalai Lama?

INTERVIEW BY MARY S. AIKINS

When talking with Tenzin Gyatso, there is another presence in the room: joy. For this simple Buddhist monk greets life with good humour that finds voice in frequent peals of deep, reverberating laughter.

Born into a family of farmers in 1935, Tenzin Gyatso was identified as the 14th Dalai Lama at the age of two. At the age of five, he became the spiritual leader of all Tibetan Buddhists.

For centuries, a succession of Dalai Lamas has ruled this “land of the snows,” nurturing a deeply religious society.

But in 1950, armies from the newly proclaimed People’s Republic of China invaded the territory. The Dalai Lama remained for nine years, trying to negotiate with China. But when a 1959 uprising for independence was brutally suppressed, he fled to neighbouring India, along with 80,000 Tibetans.

In the decades since, the Dalai Lama has remained the spiritual and political leader of his people and a symbol of hope for a free Tibet. He is a religious leader admired by followers of all faiths.*

Reader’s Digest editor-at-large Mary Aikins met with him early one morning at the Theckchen Choeling monastery in Dharamsala, India, his base for most of the year. As they talked, the pine-scented air of the Himalayan foothills outside echoed with the deep chant of hundreds of red-robed Buddhist monks.

RD: Your assistant says you are half vegetarian. How can one be “half vegetarian?”

Dalai Lama: [Laughs.] In the early 1960s, I became a vegetarian, and for almost two years I remained a strict vegetarian. But then I developed hepatitis, and I returned to my previous diet; for a while it would be vegetarian one day, nonvegetarian the next.

My kitchen is now totally vegetarian. But that doesn’t mean I am completely vegetarian, for when I visit places, occasionally I take nonvegetarian…that seems to help reduce the size of my stomach.

RD: I’m told that after a long day you often relax by watching television. What are your favourite programs?

Dalai Lama: Nature programs: National Geographic, Discovery Channel.

RD: Do you have a favourite animal?

Dalai Lama: Birds maybe. I feed birds, peaceful birds. I’m a nonviolent person, but if a hawk comes when I’m feeding birds, I lose my temper and get my air rifle.

RD: You have an air rifle?

Dalai Lama: Yes, although I shoot only to scare the hawks.

RD: You get up each morning at 3 a.m. and spend three hours meditating. If you don’t get enough time for meditation, do you get grumpy?

Dalai Lama: Grumpy? Yes, if I have busy days continuously for several months. Also, when I have audiences with people who are not serious. But I’m also eager to go to new places and to meet new people.

RD: Which people have you most enjoyed spending time with?

Dalai Lama: Other religious leaders, of course. The Pope. [Czech] President [Vaclav] Havel. [Indian Prime Minister] Pandit Nehru—he took special interest regarding the Tibetan settlement. I also came to admire [West German Chancellor] Willy Brandt. Throughout the Cold War, he gained some trust from the leaders of the Soviet Union without great cost to his own country’s rights. That’s the proper way. Stand for your own rights, your own values, but at the same time be a good friend.

RD: Are you hopeful that progress can be made between Tibet and China?

Dalai Lama: In 2002 our representatives travelled to China, and the meeting was quite positive. Previously, the Chinese would lecture harshly, but the last meeting was not that way. They expressed themselves much more gently.

China is changing: The Communist authoritarian system sooner or later also will have to change.

RD: Slowly change?

Dalai Lama: Yes, I prefer that. If there is dramatic change, then a chaotic situation may develop, and that won’t be in anyone’s interest.

The present situation in Tibet is not very safe for the Chinese. That’s why they have to suppress and brainwash people. I think the Chinese intellectuals and intelligent Chinese leaders will try to find a more reasonable way, a more realistic way. How soon, I don’t know.

RD: Do you think that, if there is not a successful negotiated agreement, young people in Tibet will turn to
violence?

Dalai Lama: The danger is there.

RD: What would your response be if Tibetans took the path of violence?

Dalai Lama: Simple. I would resign.

RD: As a monk, what experiences do you think you’ve missed that ordinary people have?

Dalai Lama: I obviously missed this [points to his groin—and laughs].

RD: Are you sorry to have missed it?

Dalai Lama: No. For monks and nuns, the practice of celibacy is not just a rule. Our main target is to try and reduce negative emotions. Sexual desire and sexual attachment are enjoyable, but these actually act as a basis to anger, hatred and jealousy.

Monks fast, and clothes are limited. All these practices are not for just getting more peace of mind, but for Moksha, liberation.

RD: More than 40 years ago, you were forced to flee your homeland. Since then, Tibet’s culture has been suppressed, and many Tibetans have died from persecution. You must feel anger or hatred about this.

Dalai Lama: Anger—I think, sometimes. But hatred, almost none. We’re trained not to. But reducing anger does not mean we give in. We carry on our struggle for our rights, for justice, but without anger. I think the real meaning of nonviolence, the demarcation between nonviolence and violence, is not action alone but mainly motivation.

RD: What special message do you have for parents?

Dalai Lama: They themselves must have a very close relationship, respect one another. That has a posi-tive impact on the child’s mind. On top of that, parents must provide ev-ery occasion for genuine human affection to the child. I think that’s very important.

[Pause.] Though I’m not sure that if I was a father I would be very good. I have a bad temper…My father also was quite short-tempered.

RD: Did he punish you and your brothers?

Dalai Lama: Oh, yes.

RD: What do you think is the most important lesson for parents to teach their children?

Dalai Lama: Human compassion, human affection, and the proper way is not by words but by action. Family life is becoming more mechanized—both parents work and there’s very little communication. Parents talk about money, the daily routine—this atmosphere is dry. Or occasionally they are fighting or, worse, divorced. These impressions, I think, enter the child’s mind, day by day, week by week.
Today children spend much time in school, from kindergarten, so teachers, too, must show affection, not just introduce their daily lessons.

RD: Religious intolerance seems to be a major source of violence in the world today. What can be done to reduce it?

Dalai Lama: I have four suggestions. One is meetings of scholars to discuss the differences and the similarities between religions. Second is meetings between practitioners from different religions. This exchange of spiritual experiences is very helpful to understand the value of other traditions. The third is to make pilgrimages to different holy places. I have visited Jerusalem, Lourdes in France and Fatima in Portugal. Here in India, I visit churches, synagogues, mosques and Hindu or Jain temples. I don’t believe in God. I don’t believe in the Creator. But I have respect. All have different beliefs, but we are all seeking inner peace and trying to be good human beings. My fourth suggestion is to hold conferences where religious leaders from different faiths come together and speak from one platform.
Now the fundamentalists, I think one of the main causes [of their intolerance] is because they remain isolated. Many Tibetan Buddhists when we were in Tibet, including myself, felt Buddhism is best. But now, after meeting other people, my feeling is we must respect other religions. To try to convert them is counterproductive and creates a lot of problems. More contact with other traditions helps to reduce this extreme fundamentalist sort of attitude.

RD: Do you find a shared spirit of ecumenism among religious leaders?

Dalai Lama: Yes, most religious leaders respect pluralism. But one Catholic priest in Paris many years ago, he actually tried to convert me to Christianity. That’s impossible! [Laughs.]

RD: Do you have a favourite saying that you use in life?

Dalai Lama: Yes, it is this prayer. If I feel a little discouraged, sad or I ask “What is the meaning of this life?” this verse gives me purpose and inner strength:

So long as space remains,
So long as sentient beings suffering remain,
I will remain,
In order to help, in order to serve…

And when things are okay, and people are praising the Dalai Lama, again this poem helps me: I am nothing but a servant to provide to others. Otherwise you may get like, “Oh, I’m quite important.” And that creates arrogance and exploitation. So, if you provide some happiness, some comfort to others, then your life becomes meaningful. If your life creates problems or suffering to others, then there’s no meaning to your existence.

* The Dalai Lama will visit Canada April 19 to May 5, 2004. Stops will include Vancouver, Ottawa and Toronto.